MISADVENTURES of LIVING ALONE AGAIN

So today was a good day, overall, but this evening, when I went over to my new place I was reminded of what it is like to live alone again. (Something I have not done in a very long time!) When you are trying to unpack from a move, there is no one except Delilah playing love songs in the back ground to provide an answer when you ask, “So, where do you think I should put this?” Her reply involving how perfect someone was for their soul mate was not what I had in mind! Okay, so truth be told, I typically always decided where to place things in my home over the years, but I still liked having the option of asking for a second opinion, even if only so I could overrule it, tee hee.

Next, I was reminded that there was no one to proclaim that a loud noise was “just the wind”. Good thing I know how to reassure myself – it’s simple, really – say a prayer for protection!

I then had no one to make the toilet stop “running.” Okay, let me think back to my property management days – the maintenance supervisor always took the lid off of the toilet first. Easy enough, I could handle that. The question was, whatever was I supposed to do next??? I tried pushing, pulling, lifting all of the parts inside until finally the tank began to fill properly. Hooray! (The only problem is that I am not sure which motion worked, so now I STILL do not know how to fix it!)

I was then anxious to hang some pictures on the wall, but many are too large to tackle alone, so I got together some of the smaller ones, but alas, my hammer & picture hangers are packed away at the bottom of some box. I had a flashback to my younger days, when I was not above batting my young little eyelashes at some neighboring man in order to gain assistance in hanging an item, repairing an item, or lending a tool. Unfortunately, my eyelashes are not so young any more, & the next door neighbor & his wife had already more than likely retired for the evening. At last I spied a single nail above the kitchen window where the previous resident had hung a clock, Even though the world is digital now, I still do like an old-fashioned clock. I reached for the inexpensive yet chic one I had just purchased, but much to my dismay, the thing would not come out of the cardboard! For the price I paid, I was shocked to find that it was actually screwed to the package with miniscule little screws which required a miniature screwdriver to loosen. No screwdrivers in sight, though, so I proceeded to unpack a box. Lo & behold, what should I find within five minutes, but a miniature screwdriver that was the perfect size! My family has always made fun of me for being a “pack rat” of sorts, but at that particular moment, I was most happy that I was one. I was very grateful to the local bank that had given me that at some Realtor Expo or another. Who knew that thing would actually come in handy one day back when I stuffed it into a plastic bag with a bunch of other knick knacks that were being shoved at me with logos of various vendors? Who knew that they even made screws that are that tiny? Not me, that’s for sure!!

Next I installed the single “AA” battery, & at least I had enough sense to wait a few minutes to see if the thing was in working order. SO glad I did this, because I had put the battery in back wards. A 50/50 chance of getting it right, but of course, I did not do so.

Climbing up on the kitchen sink with an ankle that is still weakened from my recent severe sprain was not fun – or comfortable – but I managed to do it, nonetheless. Each time I attempted to coax the hole on the back of the clock onto the nail, the nail would just sink back into the sheetrock, not leaving enough of the nail head exposed to catch the clock intended. Though I had numerous other things to be accomplishing, I refused to quit, & finally got the clock hung. I am just hoping it does not fall in the middle of the night …

On to putting out the two new lamps I just got at Lowe’s. Another surprise – who knew that a lamp could come with an assembly instruction manual? Or that it would be complex enough that it would even need one at all? But it did, & it was. It really should not take a mechanical engineer to put a lamp together. Again, though I was wasting my precious after hours time, I was determined not to quit, because I would die of embarrassment before I returned a lamp because I could not figure out how to put it together. I did not quit, & I did finally succeed! The highlight of my night was reading the Troubleshooting section of the lamps’ owner’s manuals. They started out thusly:
Problem – Light bulb does not work. Possibility: Light bulb may be burned out. Solution: Replace light bulb. The next possibility was that the cord might be unplugged, & the given solution was to plug in the power cord. All right, I may not be mechanically inclined, but at least I am a few steps ahead of that!

At the end of the night, I am dead tired, but most pleased that I was able to face each misadventure without falling apart. I can’t wait to see what other misadventures lie ahead, & I am certain that there will be some, because, as I said, I’m a bit past the age of asking knights in shining armor to ride to my rescue all of the time. (Although if you see one out there on a white horse who seems to have some time on his hands, I do still have some pictures that need to be installed!)

~ L.L.S.
Nov. 2012

 

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Published by

LouSams

I am a Southern Belle, through and through. Born and raised in North Alabama, where my family settled in 1808, when the area was still the Mississippi Territory, I come from a line of Planters, Patriots, and Pioneers. They were people who were unafraid to take risks, who said what they believed, and who honored God and their Country. Like my ancestors before me, I have strong values, believing that the Golden Rule is indeed golden. I write as a way to relate and as a release. I hope that my words may inspire, challenge and provoke one to thinking about how extraordinary things can come out of ordinary places, people, and things.

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