LIGHT TO THE RAINBOW She had never really been in love with him anyway. Just in love with the idea of him. Or perhaps she had been in love with the man that he had pretended to be. He claimed to be a musician, and would hum little ditties when they were together, always promising to write her a love ballad, but no such thing ever transpired. In the end, imagination, expectations, and reality were all at war with one another. It was some sort of bizarre love triangle destined to play out, as all love triangles do, with no real winner.
At times she felt just like that wand in the middle of the Idophone triangle when it is being reverberated against all three of those sides by an overzealous child. No doubt, that same instrument, that little wand, could make beautiful music when placed into the hands of an expert musician. The explosiveness of being bounced off of each of those sides in such a violent and repetitive manner left her with nothing but a headache. For that is what he had been: a headache. An anomaly that she had spent too much time and energy trying to figure out, when there was never any rhyme or reason to his madness. For what kind of man would weave such elaborate stories that paint pictures of a future complete with rainbows and pots of gold, all the while knowing that that he was color blind and thus could see no rainbows, and too impoverished of soul to offer any figurative gold.
Yes, in the end it was a dream made for unicorns, and no matter what they said about her being a unique creature, she was no unicorn. She was a woman made of flesh and bone and blood and sinew, and every nerve inside of her warned that even an adaptation of expectations would never be enough to bridge the great gap between his reality and her imagination.
She had a dream that one day there would come along a man who needed no such bridge. In her heart of hearts she knew that they did exist, those men who were good and kind and honorable. Not perfect, but filled with enough courage to be true to themselves and true to others as well. She knew this, because she had met them. And although not one of them belonged to her, she knew that he was there in the near distance, waiting for her.
The remaining question, then was did she seek to find him, or wait for him to find her? For the world is a dark, dark place, and it is not always easy to navigate one’s way through the winding maze of inky black passages one encounters. Suddenly, as if by Divine epiphany, she knew exactly how the process would play out. She had only to follow the Light.
For when she followed the Light, it always took her to places that exceeded her expectations and her wildest imaginations. And that is the land where she knew that he lived. That is the place where she believed he waited patiently for her. Or perhaps he was, like her, on his way there now. She would wait, and like that cloud in the desert of long, long ago, she would move when that Light moved and she would be still when that Light was still, for the one that she really loved was the Light, and He would lead her to her man, who, like her, was an imperfect human being.
But instinctively she knew that he, too, would be following the Light. For it is that Light that paints the colors of the rainbow against the backdrop of the receding storms in life. She had survived the storms, and now it was time to follow the Light. If she would just focus on doing that, it would lead her to the end of the rainbow, where her reward would be much more valuable than any pot of gold, and if she was lucky, a man, a real man – her man – would greet her with open arms when she arrived.
For she needed no unicorn. They were a beautiful idea. But like the man she had walked away from, they were too good to be true. She did not need a spotless, pure white, untarnished creature that comes out of nowhere and rides on the clouds – for they exist only in imagination. She just wanted a man, blemished from past mistakes, who was willing to follow the Light. For the Light, like new fallen snow, would cover all of the dirty past and make it clean, fresh and new. Then, reality, expectations and imagination would be free to collide, to meld, and to become one as the two of them joined hearts, and together they would hold hands, and have that rainbow for their view.
What he would look like, feel like, or even smell like, she did not know, for if you follow the Light, that is all that you need to see. But it will lead you where you need to go, to a place where chaos, confusion and karma do not win, but to a place where peace reigns. The One who controls the Light, who IS the Light? He is the Master Musician, and His music is flawless!
Obviously, in real life she understood, that even once she found him, because they are imperfect people, more mistakes would be made. But if they would just join hands and keep following the Light together, they would never lose sight of the rainbow, and in the end, they would remain in that place together, the land of Happily Ever After.
– Lou Lehman Sams